50%

@SirJeremyLondon @Bob_Janke Okay, but he better buy the good lube.

location_on

On an Emirates flight.

schedule

Invalid date

50%

@Bob_Janke @ObscureGent God, this is funny

location_on

RVA

schedule

Invalid date

40%

@Bob_Janke Wow did you print that with your portable fax?

location_on

monglover

schedule

Invalid date

30%

@Bob_Janke They have good medical.

schedule

Invalid date

30%

@Bob_Janke @TheWifeYouLove LoL 🤣

schedule

Invalid date

30%

@Bob_Janke @_steamy_mac nice thought. I do that one too.

schedule

Invalid date

20%

@Bob_Janke I always liked to think so.

location_on

United States

schedule

Invalid date

20%

@Bob_Janke @Gordie_Orwell Grow up , jealousy makes you sound like trump with President Obama !

location_on

Canada

schedule

Invalid date

20%

RT @moodyflufnstuf: I just congratulated the dog for peeing so well in the snow so don’t tell me I wouldn’t be a supportive girlfriend.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

10%

@nicamsterdam @Bob_Janke On behalf of my friend, Bob... I’m offended. BOB NEEDS LOVE TOO, LADY

location_on

Florida, USA

schedule

Invalid date

10%

RT @Fickle_Filly: Made you a mixtape of love songs but it’s just 90 minutes of me swearing.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

10%

@UncleKermit @Bob_Janke lol. the other day i saw the one where Joe steals a hawaiin shirt for mrs. Garret

location_on

CANADA, EH?!

schedule

Invalid date

10%

RT @McGrumpenstein: i’m like niacin or thiamine... people know that I should be in their lives, but no one knows why

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

10%

@nicamsterdam Excellent. I’ll assign lube to @Bob_Janke

location_on

Florida, USA

schedule

Invalid date

10%

@Bob_Janke Nah...Ferris and his goons were too cool for school, man.

location_on

SW Washington (the good one)

schedule

Invalid date

10%

@Bob_Janke I would have cut the breaks to those kids cars given the chance.

location_on

Buffalo, NY

schedule

Invalid date

10%

RT @PickleRudd: Idk what my resting (adjective) face is, but it seems to make people want to tell me about their most recent medical proced…

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-70%

@Bob_Janke And her goddamn biological clock is fucking ticking!

location_on

Nor Cal

schedule

Invalid date

-70%

RT @samdunsiger: Therapist: So why have you come to see me? Payphone: I'm having an existential crisis. I feel neglected and useless. Th…

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-60%

@Bob_Janke I've been there. V disappointed there was no Secret Service Gift Shop. Bastards.

location_on

Dallas, TX

schedule

Invalid date

-60%

RT @samdunsiger: Her: I'm sick of all your negativity. Me: What? I'm so positive. Positive that life is a pile of shit.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-50%

@Bob_Janke @VerbsRProudest Yes but they always excluded the Better off Dead kids. And I’m still mad about that.

location_on

Flah-rida

schedule

Invalid date

-50%

@Bob_Janke FERRIS BUELLER DIED IN A MASTURBATION ACCIDENT!

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

RT @JackTallent: @Bob_Janke @six_2_and_even @Peauxtassium You have to kill the queen

location_on

Massachusetts

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

@Bob_Janke We’re gonna have to fight now Bob I was afraid this day would come

location_on

Everett, WA

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

@Bob_Janke @six_2_and_even @Peauxtassium You have to kill the queen

location_on

Maryland, USA

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

RT @JRobb773: Pretty surprised at getting all this gray hair before I've even been betrayed by love and locked in a castle with a mad wizar…

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

@SirJeremyLondon @Bob_Janke I tried googling Bob Janke's skull, and that was a bit scary, so can he just bring the lube and then leave?

location_on

On an Emirates flight.

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

@An_Seabhac @Bob_Janke @SoulYodeler Apparently, you didn’t clinch enough if you’re farting that bad.

location_on

Nashville, TN

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

RT @chuuew: ME: [swole] What do you think? HER: People usually die after that many bee stings

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

RT @bonesher: my vegan coworker hates it when i gnaw on beef bones while making eye contact with her.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-30%

@Bob_Janke Might get kinda boring. All that sex every day all day long. Just sayin...

location_on

Mid West

schedule

Invalid date

-20%

@Stap_Jr @Bob_Janke After 8 beers someone else better be making those fuckers for me

location_on

Everett, WA

schedule

Invalid date

-20%

RT @GrantTanaka: Nietzsche: God is dead God: Nietzsche is dead [they both turn to camera] THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT OUR MATTRE…

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-20%

@ActorPenny @Bob_Janke Tweetin....erm, drunk.

schedule

Invalid date

-20%

@Bob_Janke Only when the weird science guys crashed them

location_on

Nashville, TN

schedule

Invalid date

-20%

RT @envydatropic: We're all insane. This isn't a competition.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-10%

RT @barryjohnharper: I want the climate of heaven & the company of hell.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-10%

@Bob_Janke @six_2_and_even no

location_on

The Shire

schedule

Invalid date

-10%

RT @ObscureGent: [When someone named Austin walks into your office] Austin: How was your... Me: No

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date

-10%

@nicamsterdam @Bob_Janke No. He’s proud of that one. It’s his own that makes him bitter and defensive.

location_on

Florida, USA

schedule

Invalid date

-10%

RT @Bob_Janke: I was watching you while you slept. You look pretty stupid.

location_on

Chicagoish

schedule

Invalid date